Hi, guys!
So, I’ve never really opened up on here, but I thought that as we’re approaching 300 followers (OH. MY. GOD. THANK YOU! WHAT?!) that I would share something personal with you.
My mom has been away for the last 2 months, and all day, I have been thinking about how excited I am that my mom is coming home tomorrow morning. It makes me laugh a bit because not even a year ago, it would have been something I dreaded.
You see, my mom and I haven’t always been on the same page – and that’s an understatement in regard to some situations. And one of our biggest fights came when she met Richard for the first time. Putting it lightly, she was not excited about the fact that I was in a serious, committed relationship with him.
I think some background information here would help: When my mom was 21, she almost lost everything in one of the deadliest earthquakes in recorded history. 70,000 people died due to the earthquake and the landslide induced by its aftershocks. My mom lived under a dining room table for two weeks until she was able to contact an uncle of hers, who picked her up and took her, my aunts and my grandmother in. From that moment, my mom devoted every ounce of her being to making a better life for herself and chasing the American Dream. And she achieved that Dream. And when she adopted me, she was at the sweet spot we all dream of: She was married to her soulmate. She was working a job she loved and gave her stability, and she was living the white picket fence life in the suburbs of the DMV area. So, naturally, she must have envisioned my soulmate as someone who would be able to offer this kind of life, if not better, especially because she worked so hard to come from nothing to become something.
Then, Richard came around. When I met Richard, he had just graduated from university and was on the job hunt. But more importantly, he proved to me that he had a heart of gold, incredible ambition, a great sense of humor, and a sincerity that still touches me to this day. From my perspective, he wasn’t where he wanted to be, but at 22, who is unless you’re a global superstar, a genius or the child of a billionaire? No hate on any of those people, but they’re rare, which is partly what makes them so cool. Anyways, Richard wasn’t where he wanted to be, but I could tell he had all the elements to get him where he wanted to be.
But my mom couldn’t truly focus on any of that. Instead, she focused on all of the negative: He didn’t have a master’s. He wasn’t 100% sure where he was going with his career. He wasn’t 100% sure how he was going to make it work when I moved to London. More than anything, the thing she didn’t like the most was the fact that he wasn’t someone she ever thought that I would end up with.
So, what’s my point? Why am I saying all this?
When I go through the LDR tags on here, I can’t tell you how many times I see people seeking out advice for fighting the haters, handling the expectations, etc. I am so glad we have this amazing community on Tumblr where we can all come together and support one another when we face the negativity. I’m so glad the LDR community on here is incredibly supportive and most of all, empathetic.
So, I just wanted to say to all of you: When you know, you know. Keep fighting for the love you have. If your SO has a positive effect on you, makes you see the world in brighter colors and in higher definition, helps you get through your darkest days, does away with your darkest thoughts with just a simple call or a text: Gain strength from that! And if your parents, friends, etc. can’t see how happy you are, how you glow with every step and how you grow into the person you were destined to be because you have someone as amazing as your SO: KEEP. FIGHTING.
I know first hand how difficult it is to get off every phone call with your mom and be absolutely broken and devastated. I know what it’s like to see my mom off at the airport with angry tears streaming down my face. But when I look back at those bumpy times in my life and Richard texts me or calls me, I realize I made the best decision I have ever made in my life. And that feeling, not knowing your gamble was right but knowing that your gamble fulfilled your destiny, that’s worth fighting for.
Love,
Cat