Tag: international ldr

If you’re in a relationship and your girlfriend/boyfriend asks you “are you okay? “

muvakita:

uhigh:

wordplayqueen:

Don’t lie to them. If y’all are in love, tell them what’s bothering you. They care. It’s okay to be vulnerable with them. Don’t tell them “yea I’m okay” and you’re not, because then you’ll be mad at them for not understanding your hurt when YOU HAVEN’T EVEN EXPLAINED IT to them. People can’t read minds. Give them the chance to listen, give them the chance to understand. Let them love you okay, communication is key.

this is soo important omg

^ !!!

Took me such a long time to understand this. I finally understand how important this is. Give into the fear of being vulnerable with your loved one – it’s so worth it!

90 Day LDR Challenge: Day 7

Day 7: What was it like the first time you two talked?

Cat: Well, while we were still messaging each other OkCupid, our messages flowed really well. And luckily, that carried on into our first date! We talked about all the things “they” tell you not to talk about, ha! But his intelligence and expressiveness just made him even more attractive to me, haha!

Richard: From what I can remember, it was really fun and relaxed. 🙂 I specifically remember we talked a lot about American things, haha.

90 Day LDR Challenge: Day 6

Day 6: How often do you see each other in person? What about over video chats?

We haven’t visited each other yet, but we will be seeing each other for our 3-year anniversary! T-minus 84 days!!! I can’t wait!

We try to Skype every other day, but it just depends on our schedule. Sometimes over the course of a week, it could be more than that, but other times, depending on what we have going on, it could be less. We really try to be open-minded and flexible with it all!

Opening Up

Hi, guys! 

So, I’ve never really opened up on here, but I thought that as we’re approaching 300 followers (OH. MY. GOD. THANK YOU! WHAT?!) that I would share something personal with you.

My mom has been away for the last 2 months, and all day, I have been thinking about how excited I am that my mom is coming home tomorrow morning. It makes me laugh a bit because not even a year ago, it would have been something I dreaded. 

You see, my mom and I haven’t always been on the same page – and that’s an understatement in regard to some situations. And one of our biggest fights came when she met Richard for the first time. Putting it lightly, she was not excited about the fact that I was in a serious, committed relationship with him. 

I think some background information here would help: When my mom was 21, she almost lost everything in one of the deadliest earthquakes in recorded history. 70,000 people died due to the earthquake and the landslide induced by its aftershocks. My mom lived under a dining room table for two weeks until she was able to contact an uncle of hers, who picked her up and took her, my aunts and my grandmother in. From that moment, my mom devoted every ounce of her being to making a better life for herself and chasing the American Dream. And she achieved that Dream. And when she adopted me, she was at the sweet spot we all dream of: She was married to her soulmate. She was working a job she loved and gave her stability, and she was living the white picket fence life in the suburbs of the DMV area. So, naturally, she must have envisioned my soulmate as someone who would be able to offer this kind of life, if not better, especially because she worked so hard to come from nothing to become something.

Then, Richard came around. When I met Richard, he had just graduated from university and was on the job hunt. But more importantly, he proved to me that he had a heart of gold, incredible ambition, a great sense of humor, and a sincerity that still touches me to this day. From my perspective, he wasn’t where he wanted to be, but at 22, who is unless you’re a global superstar, a genius or the child of a billionaire? No hate on any of those people, but they’re rare, which is partly what makes them so cool. Anyways, Richard wasn’t where he wanted to be, but I could tell he had all the elements to get him where he wanted to be.

But my mom couldn’t truly focus on any of that. Instead, she focused on all of the negative: He didn’t have a master’s. He wasn’t 100% sure where he was going with his career. He wasn’t 100% sure how he was going to make it work when I moved to London. More than anything, the thing she didn’t like the most was the fact that he wasn’t someone she ever thought that I would end up with.

So, what’s my point? Why am I saying all this? 

When I go through the LDR tags on here, I can’t tell you how many times I see people seeking out advice for fighting the haters, handling the expectations, etc. I am so glad we have this amazing community on Tumblr where we can all come together and support one another when we face the negativity. I’m so glad the LDR community on here is incredibly supportive and most of all, empathetic.

So, I just wanted to say to all of you: When you know, you know. Keep fighting for the love you have. If your SO has a positive effect on you, makes you see the world in brighter colors and in higher definition, helps you get through your darkest days, does away with your darkest thoughts with just a simple call or a text: Gain strength from that! And if your parents, friends, etc. can’t see how happy you are, how you glow with every step and how you grow into the person you were destined to be because you have someone as amazing as your SO: KEEP. FIGHTING.

I know first hand how difficult it is to get off every phone call with your mom and be absolutely broken and devastated. I know what it’s like to see my mom off at the airport with angry tears streaming down my face. But when I look back at those bumpy times in my life and Richard texts me or calls me, I realize I made the best decision I have ever made in my life. And that feeling, not knowing your gamble was right but knowing that your gamble fulfilled your destiny, that’s worth fighting for.

Love, 

Cat

Message Us Monday

I hope you guys know that Richard and I here for you whenever you need a shoulder to lean on. 

Richard and I are committed to making our space a judgment free zone and a safe space. So, if you ever feel the need to reach out, we’ll be on the other side. 🙂 

I hope you all are having an amazing start to your week!

FYI

So, you might have noticed that Richard and I skipped a few days there on the challenge. 

The thing is, to be 100% honest with you guys, things have been so cray over the past few weeks that we didn’t get to draw or write love letters to each other. We love that idea though! We will be doing it later in the year and we will snap pictures of us sending it to them. 

Also, we don’t play multiplayer games online. We’re going to figure out how to play multiplayer modes of Mario Kart on the 3DS (hopefully) soon. So, if that happens, I will snap a picture of that!

We’re just trying to catch up, and I hope you guys don’t mind. 

We’re just, in the words of the wonderful Tim Gunn, making it work. 🙂 

Your Love from Afar: Week 5

Monday- Do you both play any games together?

What games do you play? Who usually wins? Do you place any bets or rewards?

We do! Richard and I love playing games on the Wii and the 3DS. A few months before I left, I became obsessed with playing Mario 3D World and Mario 3D Land. I love playing Mario Kart 8 too. Basically, anything Mario, I will play it, and Richard will join in. Richard is way more of a gamer than I am though. He loves his new PS4, and he likes playing what I call his scary games on it. I definitely do not do scary well so that’s his time or time with his boys. Outside of game consoles, we love to play Scrabble, haha!

Hands down, Richard usually wins. He’s been a gamer all his life, and I love that about him. His hand-eye coordination is insane, and he’s so intuitive with all sorts of games. Although it means that I lose a good amount of the time, I can’t hate. I can’t! The way I see it, at the end of the day, if we get to spend time together, I’m happy. 🙂 (Cheesy, I know. Please still be my friend.)

We’ve never placed any serious bets and rewards to games… Thank God! I would be broke if we did, haha!